Tea with the Queen

[welcomequeenalice]

Superheroing was great for the soul but didn't pay the bills. Genevieve subsidized her hobby and her rent payments through working the late shift at a coffee shop. Her coworkers were a relatively ordinary mix--some went out of their way to be kind and chatty, some had a chip on their shoulder, most regarded her with an apathy that was often a relief when she needed to be alone with her thoughts and the blender. The need to focus on each coffee-related task and complete it with practiced motions was soothing and kept her from wobbling in indecision. Some days were easier than others. Some days stress threatened to eat her alive.

The Queen helped with that, but you couldn't bring the Queen to work with you...and of course there was the problem of Jervis.

Genevieve heard the voice of a coffee order as she wiped down the spout of the latte machine. She turned and saw no one, and went back to work. Late night, must be hearing things. She was short, for any gender, and occasionally had to get up on a step stool to reach the spare beans and milk stored in the hidden cabinets behind the menu boards. Seeing particularly small people over the height of the counter was even more troublesome.

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[not_a_doll]

Being the new girl in town was never easy. All right, granted she wasn't exactly new. But she did feel like a fish out of water. She'd spent so long locked away feeling sorry for herself that she had nearly forgotten what it was like to be out in the real world.

And how rude everyone could be.

If they did see her, Mary got semi-assaulted by former fans of her show. It was no wonder she'd receded from society. But, she was broke and needed to get out there again. All her savings had gone to holing up for as long as she possibly could. Now she had to find a job and get used to the outside world again.

A trip to a coffee shop for a tea seemed in order. At least she could feign, like so many writers who frequented the place, work.

"Excuse me?" Mary said, trying to be heard over the clink of cups and woosh of espresso machines. It would help if she could be seen over the counter. At 3 foot, Mary stood just as tall as your average 4 year old. Better dressed, though. Her heels added at least a few added inches.

She waved a hand above the counter. "Aren't these things supposed to be built to be handicapable?" This sure didn't feel handicapable to her.

[welcomequeenalice]

Once was coincidence, twice was a customer. Genevieve turned around again and saw the waving hand. "Oh! Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm here. Um. Sorry, what was it you wanted?" She was stumbling over her words, all in a fluster as she raced to the counter, wet rag still dangling from her hand. Herself, she came up barely higher than the cash register and had to stand on her toes to get a good look at the woman in front of her. (She was even tinier than Genevieve. Like a little doll.)

[not_a_doll]

Mary was taken aback by the fact that the barista seemed to have a similar problem. She put on a smile.

"It's ok, I just need an ultra sweet black tea latte." That would keep her awake and alert. "And one of those seasonal scone things." She deserved a little treat after coming out into the world.

[welcomequeenalice]

"Yes, of course! Yes, ma'am!" Yup, there came the social anxiety right on schedule. Her heart was fluttering in fear and shame, in that overreacting way one did when causing a slight that would be far less noticeable to the person who'd actually received it. Ultra sweet got two pumps of syrup, and Genevieve tried not to look at her while she steamed up the milk.

Stupid, stupid. As if she didn't have the same problems.

[not_a_doll]

Mary peered over the counter. Had she said something wrong? That was a rather terse reply. She chewed her bottom lip, trying to think of a way to fix the situation. She hadn't been out among other people in awhile, so it was hard to gauge what she should and shouldn't do.

Once her drink was done and handed to her, she tried to smile. "Thank you, I really need this..." She was trying to be nice, watching every word she said, unsure as they slipped out of her mouth. She probably sounded stupid.

[welcomequeenalice]

Genevieve had to stand on a stepstool to get high enough to hand the drink down to her. She was grinning too wide, the customer service grin they taught you in new hire orientation.

"Can I get you anything else?" Good lord, and she was pretty too. Maybe Gen could go on break and drown herself in the mop bucket.

[not_a_doll]

"Ooo, honey, watch out for that smile, you might break something." Mary joked, so certain it would be taken the wrong way. Why did she even try to be funny?

"Anyway...no..no, I think I'll be ok." She took her scone and tea. "I'm sorry if I was any trouble." She said quickly before turning and running for a table. She'd hide behind her laptop and hope that she hadn't embarrassed herself too badly. Better to go back to her one bedroom and try this whole out in public thing another day.

[welcomequeenalice]

Genevieve managed to hide herself in her work for a while, the flush beginning to recede from her cheeks, but only for so long.

"Jenny, could you go clear up the tables?"

"I--yeah." She hated being called Jenny, but anything to conform more to the status quo. She sidled out and started picking up cups left behind by lazy customers, occasionally rubbing a table with a wet rag, until like a lava flow creeping its way down a mountainside she wound up next to the small one.

"Is there anything else I can get you?" The words were preceded by a deep breath and came out in a huge rush, tumbling over each other as the cups shook in her hands. She was trying to smile, but not to make it too bad of a smile, just enough of a smile to be acceptable.

[not_a_doll]

Starting up her laptop, Mary started the search once more for a job. There weren't many jobs for washed up actresses, but she was just any washed up actress. She was the smallest, at least.

She sighed as she found just the same old collection of scams and admin positions. She'd put in more applications, her name would get recognized, and that would be the only reason she got an interview. Every liked to see Mary Dahl in person.

Mary jumped, startled by the other. "Oh...uhh...no, nope, I'm good. How are you?" She hoped it was ok to ask that.

[welcomequeenalice]

"Oh, I'm fine, how are you?" Genevieve chirped back, only to flinch and continue with a weak "Oh, you just told me that. You're good, I'm also good." She stood staring at the small woman, swallowed, and then to stop staring stared at her laptop instead.

The name Mary Dahl, in big letters at the top of the resume, meant nothing to her. She'd never taken an interest in pop culture or celebrity news, her apartment even lacked a TV. (At Waylon's they mainly watched sports and news.)

[not_a_doll]

Mary giggled, a girlish sound she thought herself incapable of any more. And yet there it was, the most embarrassing noise she could possibly make.

"Yup. Except for the crippling debt and anxious feeling of failure, I am just super!" Mary could have kicked herself for saying it. "Sorry...I'm sure you have better things to do than hear me complain about my life."

[welcomequeenalice]

"No, it's--really, I'm so sorry I ignored you earlier." She ran her hand over her hair, nails cutting at her scalp on the way down. No no no, this is not how we do socialization. Decades of training on how to interact appropriately with women through trial and embarrassing error were smacking into years of training on how to act like a woman herself. "You, um, you probably have a lot to worry about. I didn't mean to bother you."

[not_a_doll]

Mary smiled, trying to show, rather than tell, that it was ok. "Hey, that's not your fault. They make the counters too high...for me." Mary added. "I just hope I didn't upset you or anything. It's my first day out in a long while and, well...I'm not aware sometimes that my jokes aren't that funny." She used to have writers, damnit.

"You didn't bother me. Far from it. There are many people in this world who bug me, but you're not one of them. It's refreshing."

[welcomequeenalice]

They find mutual literature loves to talk about, and the pair walk until they run out of park to walk in. It takes Genevieve an extra 45 minutes to get home on the bus and has no regrets.

Any specific attraction she might have to Mary is quickly stifled and sat on, but she's basking in the joy of having a new friend to talk to. Waylon's lovely but there's something very different about Mary, something she can relate to--that shared understanding of what it's like to be overlooked.

Pandora's needs had to be sated, unfortunately, and Genevieve found herself looking up 'Mary Dahl' on YouTube to get an idea of her acting talents. She expected cheesy humor. What she found was ghoulish.

Everyone else was used to seeing Baby Doll, and Mary Dahl acting the part of the mature adult was like watching a child playacting the part of her mother in gaudy costume jewelry and a dress several sizes too big. Goofy, impossible to take seriously. Genevieve had met Mary as a twenty-nine-year-old job hunter, and seeing that face on a tantrum-throwing baby with curled locks was unsettling. A child might show some aspects of the looks it might hold in later years, but the face was identical. And the dates on the show's airing...that couldn't be right, could it?

Slowly, reluctantly, she found herself drifting towards Wikipedia.

[not_a_doll]

It was nice to finally find someone to talk to. Woman to woman. Mary had never had a female friend. She had never had many friends to speak of. She couldn't even count the people who had starred with her on her show. They hadn't liked her in the end. And she couldn't really blame them.

But now, Mary was certain she'd found someone who really liked her. Not for Baby Doll, but actually her. But then a sort of dread set in as she made her way home. What if Gen went home and looked her up? What would that do to their budding friendship? She worried that the only reason Gen could even stand her was that she had no idea of her past. What would Gen find if she did google her?

So, when Mary got home she found herself looking online for anything that might disturb her new friend. Sadly, she was not disappointed.

Wikipedia had been edited and reedited. The fans seemed to disagree on why Mary had left the show. And there were quotes from her costars that was less than glowing. The wiki painted her as an ungrateful brat who didn't know how good she had it. The facts were there, and it did seem someone was trying to clean it up, but for the most part Mary could tell that this would be hard to explain, should her new friend bother with this level of investigation.

Youtube was worse. They had somehow obtained video of one of her tantrums. It was horrible and Mary had to turn it off half way through and put herself to bed.

She felt her friendship was doomed. No one would want to hang out with her after seeing all that.

[welcomequeenalice]

She'd seemed so stable. More together than Genevieve was, though she assumed herself to look far more nervous than she did. Genevieve found herself running over the conversation for any hint of cruelty or selfishness, wondering if she'd let herself be sucked into a diva's sphere by kind words. So easy to be overlooked, even more easy to be taken advantage of.

Such an odd disorder, though. To be always a child and never to grow up...well, she had that fantasy every once in a while. To be Alice, little Alice without responsibilities or concerns for the future. Alice did not pay taxes or get fired from work for being misled. But to be trapped as a child? That would warp one, wouldn't it?

Lastly, she pictured to herself how this same little sister of hers would, in the after-time, be herself a grown woman; and how she would keep, through all her riper years, the simple and loving heart of her childhood: and how she would gather about her other little children, and make their eyes bright and eager with many a strange tale, perhaps even with the dream of Wonderland of long ago: and how she would feel with all their simple sorrows, and find a pleasure in all their simple joys, remembering her own child-life, and the happy summer days.

She went out on patrol with Jabberwock, and broke a few leg bones of people who had it coming, and managed to feel moderately better about herself. Waylon noticed something off about her, something wilder and fiercer about the Queen than usual, but didn't press it. She'd talk when she needed it. Thursday afternoon Genevieve was back at the coffee shop to both lament and comfort herself with the thought that she might not see Mary again anyway. Mary knew where to find her but not the reverse. Perhaps she wouldn't come back again.

[not_a_doll]

Another interview down and Mary was back on the job search trail. She wondered if she should go back to the coffee shop. Would Gen want to see her? It could be that her imagination was running away with her, that she was only assuming that Gen would look her up online.

But then why wouldn't she? Mary had said she was famous, and that was the kind of thing a person went home and looked up.

The coffee shop was close to her apartment, and Mary couldn't help herself. If Gen didn't want to talk to her, well, then that would be ok. She wouldn't press her luck.

"Uhh, hey." Mary said, as she reached the counter. God, she sounded so weird. Stop sounding weird. There was nothing weird going on. Yet.

[welcomequeenalice]

She'd been waiting on that voice all day. Bracing for it, pining for it, and it still made her jump a little.

"Hi!" No fear no fear big smile. She stood on tip-toe to look at Mary over the high expanse of the counter. "How are you? The same as last time?"

Wait crud what did she have last time?

[not_a_doll]

Mary put on a smile, pushing down her feelings as Geni seemed just fine. Maybe she had worried for nothing.

"I think I might just go with a hot chocolate this time. It's been another rough one. I think people are laughing behind my back at these interviews."

[welcomequeenalice]

"Why would they do that? Oh, do you want whipped cream?" Making the drink was a good excuse to have her back to Mary. No, she didn't wonder, she knew and wished she hadn't.

Poor woman. Or perhaps she deserved it. Genevieve hoped not.

[not_a_doll]

"Yes, please." Mary chewed her bottom lip. Oh, she knew why people did that now. She knew why no one wanted to hire her.

"Cause there are videos on youtube of me being...well, horrible." Mary sighed. It was best to get it out now. At least if she told Gen about it before she found it all maybe she could save this somehow.

"I wasn't a good person when I was younger." Not that her family had helped. "So now no one in the industry wants to work with me. And everyone employer looks me up and boom, no job. That and I'm a freak show." She had thought that's all it was. But no, now she knew the truth.

[welcomequeenalice]

"I--I understand how that can be." The machine whirred as the milk heated up. "I mean, I could imagine!"

Could, but didn't need to.

[not_a_doll]

Mary's face fell slightly. "So you did see that..." And had already made a judgement. "Well...I guess I'll just take my hot chocolate then. No hard feelings. I get it." She was a horrible person. No one would want to be around her. Not any more.

[welcomequeenalice]

"I--wait, no!" Genevieve whirled, flecks of hot chocolate spitting from the cup. At the other end of the bar her coworker rolled her eyes at Tetch's usual tetchiness.

"I mean, no. That's not what I meant!" The hot chocolate was placed down with unsteady, panicking hands. "Not what I meant," she repeated, holding the cup where Mary was just a few inches too short to reach it.

[not_a_doll]

Mary stopped and tensed slightly as Gen panicked. She didn't mean to make her freak out, but she was just a little hurt.

"I know I was a bad person, ok? I've spent a lot of time trying to think of a way to repent, but it's kind of hard when no one will even talk to you like a human being." Especially an adult one.

"There has only been one person in the last ten years who even bothered to hear my side of things and he...well, he's not able to any more."